I May Have Seem Like I've Change, But No. Because Deep Down Inside, I'm Still The Same.

Got Back My Results For The 4 Papers. As Usual, Bad Results, But Not Too Bad Because I Studied And Revised Last Minute Again And The Effort I Put In Wasn't Even 50%. A,B,C,D+. No Fail, But When I Look At People Around Me, Everyone Did So Much Better And I Really Feel So Inferior. But I'm Happy For Those Who Did Well Because I'm Sure They Did Put In Lots Of Effort And They Deserve It. I Don't Even Think I Deserve The Results I'm Getting. I Mean Like Really. I Should Be Worse Off.

And This Never Changes. For Most People, It's Hard To Get Themselves To Start Studying, But Once They Start, They Stay Consistent Throughout, But Not Me. I Find It Easy To Start, But I Can't Maintain. Like I Can Do Notes And Revise For All My Modules For This Whole Week But I'll Stop Doing Those For The Next Week. I'm Just Not Consistent. NOT AT ALL. I'm Lazy. Real Lazy. I Rather Slack Then Revise My Work. It's Just Me And It Has Always Been Like That.

Effort. That's Just What's Between Me And My A Grades. I Know Of The Problem. I Know The Solution To It. What I Don't Know Is How To Fit Myself Into The Solution. I Come Back Everyday, Tired From A Day Of Lecture And Tutorial And I Find Myself So Sleepy When I Reach Home That I Barely Can Start On My Revision And I Don't Last Long. Shag. Damn Shag.

When Will I Ever Get Used To It..

知道问题在哪里
知道该怎么做
知道从哪里开始
却不知道什么时候会习惯

Looks May Be Deceiving. I May Look Calm On The Outside But Who Can See What's On The Inside?

BA Comm Camp 2013 Was Greatttt! Was Quite Fun Though I Feel That BFS Camp Was More FUNNN! Had Alot Of Dirty Games And All~ But Those Games Just Made Me Into A More Daring Person. Made New Friends Again. But In The End, I Realised, What I Need Are Still Close Friends. Those That I Can Rely On Or Seek Help.

Looks Are Really So Deceiving. I May Seem Like I Don't Care And I Really Tried Not To. Tried My Best To Keep All My Thoughts At Bay And Tried To Keep My Mind Occupied. And It Helps. But When I'm Lazing Around, That's When.. My Mind Goes Into A Turmoil. All The Thoughts Starts Running Wild. I Don't Even Know What I'm Thinking. I Really Don't. It's Always The Same Old Empty Feeling That Haunts Me. Lonely. Really Missed Those Times Whereby, I Will Head Down To The Fitness Corner In The Middle Of The Night To Do Some Reflection And 'Vent' My Frustrations By Training Hard. Stress Reliever. But This Days I Rarely Have The Time To Do So, Or Am Too Tired. And I Haven't Jog For A Month. Arghhhhhh...

Haven't Started On My Projects And Tutorial. Just One More Week Of Holidaysss And I'm Still Lazing Around And Having Fun. Starting To Feel Really Screwed~

其实我好害怕

害怕成长的我

会变成另一个我不认识的人

因为生活只会变得越复杂

Afterall, What You Might Be Seeing Now Is An Illusion, Because You Don't Know What's Deep Down Inside.

Had A Whole Lot Of Fun Today. Though Only Half Of UB Turned Up. But The Half Was Enough To Make My Day. Great Bunch Of Friends, Closer To Me Then I Am Closer To My Real Brother. Thank You So Much For Today!

Watched 'Now You See Me' In The Afternoon Today. Was A Really Great Show Filled With Illusions And 'Magic'. The Show Made Me Think Through Quite Alot. And The Ending Was Kinda Unexpected. HAHAA! I Shan't Be A Spoiler. But Definitely A Movie Worth Catching. Following There Was LAN Session. But Quite Bored Actually Cause Everyone Did Their Own Things. But Mahjong After That Was Greattt! Had Super Loads Of Fun Though I Lost Some $$ Again. No Luck. Hehe!

And When I'm Free, I Tend To Think Of Things That Happen Around Me. Think Of Everything I Could Possibly Think Of. And Suddenly I Thought Of This. Yes This. Just A Story I Would Like To Share.

I'm Single For The Past 17 Years And It Has Always Been This Way. Nope Not Even Once Was I Attached, Neither Have I Went For A Real Date Before. Not Even Close I Guess. Yep. But Still, I Don't Feel There Was A Need To Be Attached Or What Because I'm Single And I'm Happy And Satisfied With The Friends Around Me Whom I Can Go Crazy With. Not Like I Needed A Partner. But As Humans, We Are All Curious. I'm Curious Of The Feeling To Be Attached To Someone. What's This Strong Feeling? I Still Don't Know How It Feels Like.

But On A Side Note, People Do Judge You. I Mean I Tell People I'm Not Attached And Neither Do I Have Any Ex And People Will Be Like.. You're 17 And Haven't Gone Through A Relationship. Maybe Maybe. I'm Quite Sure It's Not Because Of My Looks Or Character. Maybe The Age. Because It's Becoming More And More Popular And People As Young As Primary School Kids Can Even Get Attach. Puppy Love Maybe. But When It Comes To Love, Most Things We Do Because Of It Are Usually Explainable. And It's Not Up To Us To Choose Who We Actually Fall In Love With Because When We Do, We Do So Unknowingly. Just Like Love At First Sight. Do You Believe In It? It's A Mystery.

And It's Definitely True That As Guys, What We Look For In A Girl If I'm Not Wrong, Is Looks. Maybe 90% Looks And 10% Character. I Mean Most Of The Guys, Not All. But For Girls, They Are Just Looking For Mr Right, Who Is Sweet, Caring And Can Easily Put A Smile On Their Face Anytime. Looks Doesn't Matter Alot In This Case. I Think That's The Main Reason Why Most Girls Put Make-Up, And Most Guys Doesn't. 

Back To The Main Point. As For Me. I Don't Know If Love Is The Right Word To Describe It. Maybe Crush? Have A Few Crushes Before. But None Really Gave Me The Courage To Go All Out For It. Guess I'll Still Have To Wait. I'm Still Young Afterall.

如果缘分到了

就让它顺其自然吧

When Two Worlds Collide, Will My World Be Your World?

My Blood Is Boiling. Though It Shouldn't Be. I Try So Hard To Hold It Back But In The End It Just Overflew And Burst. HAHAAA! FML Man. Why Should I Even Be Bothered. I Mean I Organise That Date Like 2-3 Weeks In Advance And Those Who Didn't Make It Never Said They Couldn't Make It. And I Even Put Reminders On The WA. But End Up Tomorrow Only Probably Half Will Be Turning Up. Cool Or What!? HAHAA!

If You Haven't Organise Anything Before, You Would Never Be Able To Feel The Pain Of An Organiser. NEVER. And People Just Take It For Granted And Just Have Fun. But No One Ever Gets Thankful For The One Behind The Scenes.

1) People Who DON'T REPLY MESSAGES. Most Annoying Ones.
2) People Who Say They Will Turn Up And Last Minute Back Out.
3) People Who Say They Will Turn Up And Last Minute MIA And Cannot Be Contacted. Ninja Or What!?
4) People Who Are Forever Busy And It's Hard To Fit Their Schedule In.
5) People Who Wants An Outing And End Up Cannot Turn Up Because Of Another Outing. Ironical.
6) People Who Have Lessons Or Projects Even Last Minute.. No Comments.
7) Family Matters Last Minute.. No Comments
8) People Who Ninja From The Start..
9) People Who Are Forever Late. Not 15-30 Mins Late. When I Mean Late, It Means Really Late Like 1-2 Hours.
10) People Who Always Say Bo Jio Then Jio Already Cannot Come.
11) People Who Last Min Back Out Because Too Little People Turn Up
12) People Who Can Go But No Money.
13) People Who Can't Wake Up Early.
...

Okay. Maybe I'm In No Right To Rage At You. I'm Just Being Stupid To Organise This Stuffs And What's More, It Was Due To Your Request And End Up You Still Cannot Turn Up And Cannot Say So Earlier. And Still Say You Miss Us. Bullshit. The Last Time You Already 放飞机, This Time Also The Same. What To Expect? (:

In The End All That Happens Is The Organiser's Fault. Less People Turn Up Also Organiser's Fault. Cannot Turn Up Also Organiser's Fault Because The Date Set By Organiser Was Wrong. Everything. Organiser's Fault. People Never Will Be Grateful To You. People Will Never Understand Either.

End Up I Rant So Much It Just Falls Down Into One Thing. I'm Stupid. Do This Kind Of Shit Job That No One Wants To Do. Stupid Me. Hate Myself. But I Am Still Who I Am.. It Sucks To Be Me. And I Hate Myself For Raging. I Mean Why Should I, Because Even Without Some Of This People, We're Still Gonna Have Lots Of Fun. So Far It's Been This Way For The Past Outings. I Should Just Stay Happy. Happy For Those Who Turn Up. Those Who Don't, I Can't And Won't Be Bothered. (: HAPPY HAPPY. THAT'S MY AIM. (:

还是珍惜你身边的一切吧

不要把所有的事

当做是理所当然的

因为总有一天

如果消失了

你会后悔

I Don't Even Know If I Should Try, Because What I See Is A Star Beyond Reach. But Then Again, You Never Really Know Till You Try.

Life's Been Great Since The Holidays Started On Fridayyyy! 

1) Chomp Chomp With My Bros And Sis On Friday Night! Pretty Much Awesomeee. 

2) And Went For BFS Camp On Saturdayyy! It Was Supposed To Be A 3D2N Camp, But I Didn't Turn Up On The First Day And There Were No Activities On The 3rd Day. So It Was Pretty Much Like A One Day Camp To Me. And It Was Great. Way Exceeded My Expectations. The Camp Was Super Fun Lahhs!

3) But The Main Thing Was Todayyy (Yesterday)! HAHAA! Really Damn Long Time Since I Had This Much Fun! Had K Session With My Bros At Kampung Chai Chee CC At Bedok. The Rates Were Damn Cheappp. If You Book A Room Between 12-2pm, The Rates Is $8 Per Pax For 5 Hours If You're A Student. After That Timing Would Be $8 For 3 Hours. And You Also Get A Free Drink! Worth It TTM. (:

4) After Which, There Was Mahjong Session At Night At Edmond's Houseeee! HAHAAA! Damn Fun And Shioks Lahhh! So Long Never Play Mahjong Alreadyyy. Lost In The End But It's Okays. (: And Edmond's Mum Was Really Niceee To Cook Us Supper! (:

And There's So Many Other Things I Wanna Do And Am Going To Do Hopefully. Cycling. Bowling. Pool. Running. BBQ. Movie Marathon. Buffet! LOTS OF THEM!!~ P.S. I LOVE FOOD. Let's Hope This 2 Weeks Is Enough ( Though I Know It's Definitely Not ). And I Don't Want To Think Of What's After That. I Just Want To Enjoy Life Now.

I Just Hope I Will Be Able To Get Over You. Hopefully It's Just A Crush. It's Not LOVE. No Wayyy. Not Possible Anyways. That Would Be A Joke Man.

其实你不懂我的时间

都是用来想念

你什么时候才会

到我的身边

 也许永远都不会

The Pain I'm Feeling Right Now, How Do I Even Describe It? I Don't Even Know Why I Am Feeling This Way. Maybe I Don't Want To Know.

Good Or Bad First? Bad Bah. Don't Think I Did Well For Any Of My CT. I Stepped Into The Exam Hall And My Mind Goes Blank.. But I Don't Want To Think About What's Over. Shouldn't We Be Forward Looking? What's Happened Has Happened, No Point Brooding Over It. Good News Is That Tomorrow Will Be My Last CT Paperrr! Wooohoooooo! (:

Will Alsoooo Be Having Camp Tomorrow Till Sunday. HAHAA! I Really Want To Not Think About Anything. Keep My Mind Busy. (: And Can't Wait For Next Week! Meeting My Fellow UB's. And Meeting Up With Many Of My Other Friends. Great Week Aheaddddd.

And Sometimes It Feels So Hard To Explain. Like How You're Feeling. And Even Describing It. To Put It Simply.. There's This Weird Feeling In Me. When You're Feeling Low And All, I Will Feel Low Too. But This Isn't Supposed To Happen. What The Fack Is Wrong With Meee? I Really Wish I Could Do Something To Make You Feel Better, Feel Happier But You Know, There's Nothing I Can Do. Okay. I Should Stop All This Thoughts. Helpless. Hopeless.

是我知道了

却继续选择不知道

还是我不知道

却装作知道

I Really Hope, Everything Just Dies Down. My Feelings. My Thoughts. What I'm Doing For You. I Must Be Crazyyyy.

Meet Up Session With My Bros On Friday, And It Was Great And A Whole Lot Of Fun. I Mean Even Though All We Did Was Chat, SnapChat And Fun Run And Subway For Dinner. HAHAA. But When You Have Crazy Friends, Anything You Do With Them Is Really So Fun. And I've Not Seen AKY For Like Months, So That Was Kinda Great!

Yesterday Wasn't That Productive. Only In The Morning And Early Afternoon I Was Studying And Revising, But Once It Reaches Evening, I Start Feeling Really Sleepy And Just Slacked All The Way. HAHAA. Dafuggg Right? CT Is Only 2-3 Days Away. But At Least I Did Sum Up Everything For ITB So It'll Be Alot Easier When I Revise One More Time. ITB Is Really Such A Boring And Burden Module.. But Luckily There's Only CT And No Final Exams! HAHAA!

And Today Morning Was Unproductive As Well. I Think I'm Screwed. Too Many Distractions At Home. And The Weather Is Making Me Really Lazy And Sleeeeepy. HAHAA! Hopefully Tomorrow Will Be Better. I've Decided. AMK Library Is The Best Place To Studyyy. Haven't Been There For Quite Some Time. Shall Head Down Early In The Morning Tomorrow And Queue To Get In. Hopefully There Are Seats Available Then I Can Start My Mugging. Alone. No Distractions. (:

Tun Yang, You Really Need To Stop Thinking. And Imagining. You Ain't Got Any Chance. Stop Dreaming. Or Maybe, Leave Everything In Your Dreams. Reality Is Nothing. Stop Everything You're Doing For Her. She Won't Be Able To See It Anyways. No Chance. NO CHANCE. Okay.

我的付出最终

我想你应该没机会

看到了

因为我晓得

自己会有这个机会