It's Not Always True That You'll Get Paid For Trying Hard, But Then Again, If You Don't Try Hard, You'll Never Know The Outcome.

Time Passes So Fast, First Week Of Poly Life Has Ended Already. Enjoying Poly Life For Now. First Week In NP Was Super Awesomeee Lah. Made Even More New Friends And Got To Know My Classmates! But Some Of The Lectures Were Quite Boring And The Lecturers Were Either Speaking Too Fast Or Speaking Too Soft, So I End Up Having To Go Through The Slides Myself Again Because I Really Catch No Ball. But Workshops And Tutorial Were Engaging. Magnitude'13 Yesterday Was Plain Awesomeeee! Had Some Great Time Shaking Those Ass.

I Don't Know Why, But Maybe I'm Plain Stupid Or What. I Can't Believed I Actually Put Interest In 7 CCA's And Now There're So Many Tryout Sessions That My Next Week Schedule Is So Packed~ But Still, Hope I Get To Meet More People And Make New Friends. (: And Yup, I Will Also Be Able To Find Out Which One I Enjoy Most And Join That CCA. And Ambassadors Interview Turned Out Great, But Even If I Go Through This Round, There'll Be 2 More Rounds Of Interview! HAHA! It's Not Gonna Be Easy. But I'm Up For The Challenge!

Haiz. Really Hope I'm Not Having A Crush. Enough Of All This TY. I Don't Feel Like I'm Good Enough For Anyone. But That Isn't The Main Point. The Last Time I Tried So Hard And I Still Failed, It's Hard To Get Over It. It Isn't Just About The Money, But More Importantly The Effort And Time I Put In. I Thought At Least Someone Would Appreciate It. And My Gift Was Definitely One Of A Kind. But It Turned Out You're Not That Someone. Disappointed. I Don't Want To Fall In Love Again. I Don't Want To Try. Why Can't I Just Give Up? Why? Screw All Those Feelings And Emotions. In The End, I Just Need The Motivation I Get From This Feelings.

I See A Great Week Ahead, So I'll Stay Positive~

就算我爱上了你

我也会装作不在乎

因为在乎了又会怎样

我只不过不想失望

If You Try Hard Then Fail, Then You Just Got To Try Harder..

Lazy.. But Got The Sudden Feeling To Blog! HAHAA!

For The Past 1 Month...

 

Finally Quitted My Survey Job! It Really Sucks Towards The End Because For The Remaining Categories For The Project, It Was Rather Hard To Get Companies Stuff To Do The God Damn Survey! ): And After Like Working For More Then 2 Weeks, I Haven't Gotten My Pay Yet Since Then!!!~

So After Quitting The Job, Actually Spend Like 2 Weeks Having Fun With Friends!

Then Came FOCAS! Quite A Fun Camp And Made Some New Friends! Also Got To Know About What Are Some Of The CCA's Offered By NP As Well As Familiarise With The Place Better. It Was A Great Experience! And Somehow Came Many Outings Right After The Camp. And The Whatsapp Group Is Somehow Super Active~ (:

And.. The Best Achievement In My Whole Entire Life, Happened On 31st March. 2XU Compression Run! Completed 21km In 1h 46mins And Came In 281/7433! Achievement Unlocked Lah! (: (: (:

Yesterday Had Chomp Chomp With Close Friends! Had Lots To Catchup! HAHA! And I Think I've Put On Much Weight.. We Had Like Hokkien Mee, Stingray, Satay, Hotplate Oyster Omelette... Fat Die Me! ):

Went To Malaysia Today.. And Had A Durian Feast~

And Also Headed To Mt. Ophir To Have A Glismpe Of The Waterfall.. And I Can't Believe It's The 2nd Time I've Been There..

Next Up Is The BAOC ( Business & Accountancy Orientation Camp ) ! Hope To Make As Many New Friends Whom I'll Be Seeing Often Since We'll Definitely Be In The Same School (YDS) LOL!!

And Anyways~ Don't Know Why, But All Of A Sudden, I Feel Really Thankful. Thankful For All My Friends. I May Not Have Many Friends Compared To Some Others, But Still, I Have Friends Whom I Can Have Fun With, Joke Around With. I Have Friends Whom I Can Pour My Hearts Out To. I Have Friends Who Gives Me Confidence, Motivates Me. I Have Friends Who Gives Me Sincere Advices, Comfort Me. I Have Friends Who Treats Me Sincerely, One Who Doesn't Take Me For Granted. I Have Friends Who Understands Me. I'm Really Really Thankful For Such Friends.

And My Family.. I Still Can Remember Vividly, About 2 Years Back Then, I Really Hated My Life. I Thought My Life Was Screwed. Others Had iPhone And Everything Else You Could Imagine And I Was Stuck With Some Noob Phone. And Others Had Freedom, Could Go Out Anytime And Come Back Home After Midnight And I Couldn't Even Go Out Often. Because Of This, I Also Hated My Parents, Had Alot Of Falling Out With Them. But Now, I Have An iPhone And I'm Enjoying My Freedom To The Fullest! Really Thankful For That. Shows That My Parents Trusted Me, And For Trusting Me, I've Showed Them How Much I've Matured. I Might Come Home Late In The Middle Of The Night, But I Don't Break The Law, I Don't Smoke, I Don't Do Stupid Things. I'm So Happy That My Parents Actually Gave Me This Chance, Gave Me This Freedom.

Okay This Is So Sudden, But Still, I Feel Really Blessed. Blessed For Everything I Have Today.

当你开始对自己有信心的时候

相信自己的时候

别人对你的肯定也会慢慢增加

How Will You React When You Found Out That What You Were Doing All Along Has Suddenly Lost It's Meaning..

Don't Actually Want To Blog Because Of Really Many Reasons. But Still.. After Reading Some Of The Old Post, I Found It Really Enjoyable, So I'll Be Writing This Post So That I'll Be Able To Remember What Happen During This Period Of Time In The Future And Also How I Pulled Through! (:

Hmm. So Where Do I Start.. Okay So At The Start Of February, I Actually Did Some Simple Redemption Counter Stuff Just For 1 Day! Made A New Friend! HAHAAAAA And He's Currently Studying In University! Learn Quite Alot From Him! And Yup I Enjoyed This Job, Maybe Because I Enjoy Speaking To People.

So Comes CNY, Collecting Ang Baos As Well As Mahjong And Card Sessions Were Great. Felt Great To Be Meeting My Distant Relatives After 1 Year And Yup, Everyone Has Indeed Aged And Grown Older And Wiser (Hopefully)! HAHAA!

Okay So Next Up I Actually Took Part In This Lion Dance Introductory Workshop For Schools. I Was Helping Out Because The Pay Was Really Good. Actually Pick Up Some Simple Lion Dance Moves ( I Can Now Be The Backside Of The Lion! HAHAHAA )! The Pay Was How Good? $30 Per Hour And Just For 2 Hours! HAHAA Simple Job, Fast Money!

Hmm. After That, Comes Chingay Event Which Is Very Recent. Did Some Traffic Counter Job. Really Can Bore To Death! Pay Was Okay $37.50 For 4.5Hours For 2 Days! This Year's Chingay Feels Abit Short Somehow.. But I Like Those Person Singing, Because They Sang Songs Which Used To Be My Favourite.

Now, Currently I'm Doing Some Survey Job Through The Telephone. Pay Is Not Bad, But I Should Be Quitting Soon Because Of My Throat. I Don't Have The Stamina To Speak Fast And Accurately For Long Hours Everyday. But I Really Enjoy Striking Conversations With Strangers So Long As They're Friendly And Willing To Share With Me. (:

For Now, Just Received My Enrollment Package For Poly! Super Troublesome! But Still, I Can't Wait For School Term To Start And Also Start Making New Friends! (:

不敢说不是因为我不在乎

而是因为我太在乎

怕会失去你

Slowly One Step At A Time, I'll Find Myself Lighter, Going Higher, Leaving My Feelings Behind, Leaving Everyone Behind, Leaving My Old Self Behind.

January Is Almost Over. What I've Achieved This Month.. Nothing Much. I'm Really Wasting My Time. It's Time For Some Reflection.

Jogging - Generally For This Month, I've Covered Distances Up To About 50km. I Know I Really Need To Step Up Since I've Sign On For 2XU Compression Half Marathon And At This Rate, I Think I Can Barely Manage To Finish This 21km. But Good Progress Nevertheless Because It's Been A Long Time Since I Covered This Much In A Month. Ganbatte!

And.. Learning To Make My Own Meals. I've Made Good Progress Too! I Know I Need To Upgrade Myself Constantly, Rather Than To Waste My Time. 

Having Fun Is No Doubt Important! But As I Ask Myself And Wonder.. What Do I Gain At The End Of The Day? Nothing Much, Except Memories. Some Memories Are Worth Remembering.. Some Are Worth The Trouble Of Tossing Away. And I'm Spending Money Like Drinking Water.. Considering I'm Not Working Anymore.

But Whatever It Is, On Thursday, The Posting Results Will Be Out And I Will Know Which Direction I'll Be Heading. Good To Know I'll Not Be Heading In The Opposite Direction.

这种感觉受过一次就够了，我会慢慢学会看清事实的残酷，看穿那些带上假面具的人。

就算一切可能够回到从前

我已经没有把握在相信

一切不会有今天的结果

Slowly Drifting Apart From Your Friends Is The Worst Feeling Ever. But I'll Be Getting Over It Soon.

Still Can't Find A Job.. So Either I Go Out And Spend Money Or Stay At Home And Rot. At Least This Kind Of Feeling Ain't Bad. I Don't Feel Stress.

Fake People All Over. Fake Feelings Maybe. Think I'm Not Going To Trust Anyone Easily Anymore. I Give Up. It's Over Time When You Start Understanding People And Really See If They're True Friends That Could Last Throughout Your Entire Life. I Was Too Naive. 太天真了。

这种感觉绝对不好受。因为让人靠得太进所以最后受到伤害的是自己。这也只能怪自己太天真了。早就应该离开你们了但因为有太多放不下的回忆，所以我付出了全部，希望能挽回一切，一切能够回到从前。但这是不可能的事。我曾经式过，现在终于醒悟了，还不算是迟。

说真的你们把我当成什么？我真的很好奇。我现在已经无法判断谁是我该相信的，谁是我不该相信的。我已经受够了，累了。你们有时对我好，有时却对我冷漠但现在却不一样。是我变了还是你们都变了。在我眼里一切都变了。

也对，时代都会变，有什么是不会变的呢？我已经是过去了，在你们眼里，也许我只是棋子，虽你们去摆。是我太用心了，太包容，所以你们一直都没察觉。要怪也是怪我自己。现在我不能在傻下去了，该是时候离开了。从用心，一切都会变成死心。我不能在折磨自己，这只会让我更恨我自己。谢谢你们给我那些美好的回忆。虽然想不到下一站该去哪里，但如果我勇敢的往下走，一定会抵达目的的。如果我变成回忆，希望你们不会忘记。

我的痛苦谁能体会

我的悲伤谁能感受

我的自责谁能解脱

我的不足谁能谅解

Am I The Only One Stucked Here, Not Wanting To Move On? Screw It Man. It's Like I Want To, But I Don't Want To.

When Reality Is Harsh, We Just Accept It. I Wish It Was That Simple. I Want To. I Really Want To. But It Feels So Hard To Swallow. I Want To Just Gulp It Down. I Can't.

My O Level Results Just Sucks. I Was Aiming 10 Or Below But I Expected 12. And I Got It. Just Unexpectedly. Didn't Expect Both My Humanities To Be A B3. It Just Sucks. Neither Did I Expect Both My Pure Sciences To Be An A2. Life Just Love Throwing Me Surprises. And It Sucks Even More When After I Deduct 2 Points, It's Still 1 Short Of Entering MJC Or NYJC.

Now I'm Really Caught In A Dilemma. Guess I Regretted Not Working Even Harder. They Say 1 Point Doesn't Make A Difference, But It Does. NOW IT DOES. WHY??? OMG. So Many Things I Really Regretted. Regretted Not Taking HMT. Regret Not Dropping To Combine Science, Cause I Could've Gotten An A1...

Now Dilemma. I Can't Make The 'Perfect' Decision. I Don't Mind Going To JC. But I Want To Enter A Good One, Because If I Enter An Average Or Lousy JC, Going Into University Won't Be Easy Too And I'll End Up Not Being Able To Enter The Course I Want To. I Need At Least An AAA/B For My IGP. How Easy Can That Be!? 

Now, If I Go Polytechnic, I'll Be Heading To NP Cause Their Business Courses Are The Best In Singapore.  I'll Probably Be Taking Up Business And Financial Studies. Problem? NP Is Really Far From My Home. Though There's Shuttle Bus From Hougang, When I Head Home, I'll Need About An Hour. And When I Enter Local Universities, I Don't Get A Year Exemption But Only Some Modules Exemption. And I'll Need At Least A 3.80 GPA Score.

So Now.. Polytechnic Or JC? I Guess I'll Leave It To Fate. I Just Believe That No Matter Where I Go, If I Work Hard, I'll Succeed. I Will.

Now.. The Most Difficult Part. To Accept Is The Fact That I'll Be Going Separate Route As My Friends And We Won't Be Able To Meet Up As Often Or Maybe Even Once In A Blue Moon. It Really SUCKS That JC Holidays Doesn't Clash With Polytechnic Holidays. It Just Means.. Chalets, Outings, Meet-Ups, Basketball, Cycling, Frisbees, Movies, Buffets, Shopping, Memories, Lepak Together.. Maybe Not Really No More, But Not That Common. Now.. Moving On Is The Stupid Part. It's Harsh. It Ain't Easy. But I Guess Everyone Has To Go Through That. It's Just Part Of Life.

时候到了

该往下一站了

我走了

再见了

I Really Love How It Is Now.. Those Friendships.. They're Wonderful. I Hope They Will Last Forever. But Will They?

A Great Way To Start The Year With A Memorable And Unforgettable Chalet! HAHAA! It Was Really Fun. Didn't Regret Going Though My Pocket Really Got A Hole Already!

First Day, I Came At Night Just For The BBQ. The Food Was Really Niceeeeee! Thinking Of It Just Whets My Appetite! The Satay Was Good, So Were The Chicken Wings! (: The Baked Rice Was Also Nice! HAHA! And Not To Mention, The Breezer Was Really Good! Someone Even Got Drunk! HAHAA!

Spent Most Of The Second Day Rotting In Chalet! Not Really Though. Watched CZ12 In The Afternoon And It Was A Great Movie! Quite A Comedy Show! The Rest Of The Time I Was Just Lazing On The Comfy Bed While Some Went To Play Pool. Didn't Join Them For Gambling Also!

Day 3 Was Awesome! At Around 1 am, We Went Cycling Till About 4 am, Covering 22.30 km! Whole Body Aching! AHhhhhhhh. And Drinking Again In Broad Day Light! LOL!

For Now, Just Exactly 1 More Week Till I Get My O Level Results, So I Want To Play As Much As I Can! Because I Know After I Get Back My Results, I Will Be Demoralised And Will Not Have The Mood To Play Anymore!

一切都会过去

这只是迟早的事

但是你们让我的人生

充满了无数珍贵的美好回忆

谢谢