Slowly One Step At A Time, I'll Find Myself Lighter, Going Higher, Leaving My Feelings Behind, Leaving Everyone Behind, Leaving My Old Self Behind.

January Is Almost Over. What I've Achieved This Month.. Nothing Much. I'm Really Wasting My Time. It's Time For Some Reflection.

Jogging - Generally For This Month, I've Covered Distances Up To About 50km. I Know I Really Need To Step Up Since I've Sign On For 2XU Compression Half Marathon And At This Rate, I Think I Can Barely Manage To Finish This 21km. But Good Progress Nevertheless Because It's Been A Long Time Since I Covered This Much In A Month. Ganbatte!

And.. Learning To Make My Own Meals. I've Made Good Progress Too! I Know I Need To Upgrade Myself Constantly, Rather Than To Waste My Time. 

Having Fun Is No Doubt Important! But As I Ask Myself And Wonder.. What Do I Gain At The End Of The Day? Nothing Much, Except Memories. Some Memories Are Worth Remembering.. Some Are Worth The Trouble Of Tossing Away. And I'm Spending Money Like Drinking Water.. Considering I'm Not Working Anymore.

But Whatever It Is, On Thursday, The Posting Results Will Be Out And I Will Know Which Direction I'll Be Heading. Good To Know I'll Not Be Heading In The Opposite Direction.

这种感觉受过一次就够了，我会慢慢学会看清事实的残酷，看穿那些带上假面具的人。

就算一切可能够回到从前

我已经没有把握在相信

一切不会有今天的结果

Slowly Drifting Apart From Your Friends Is The Worst Feeling Ever. But I'll Be Getting Over It Soon.

Still Can't Find A Job.. So Either I Go Out And Spend Money Or Stay At Home And Rot. At Least This Kind Of Feeling Ain't Bad. I Don't Feel Stress.

Fake People All Over. Fake Feelings Maybe. Think I'm Not Going To Trust Anyone Easily Anymore. I Give Up. It's Over Time When You Start Understanding People And Really See If They're True Friends That Could Last Throughout Your Entire Life. I Was Too Naive. 太天真了。

这种感觉绝对不好受。因为让人靠得太进所以最后受到伤害的是自己。这也只能怪自己太天真了。早就应该离开你们了但因为有太多放不下的回忆，所以我付出了全部，希望能挽回一切，一切能够回到从前。但这是不可能的事。我曾经式过，现在终于醒悟了，还不算是迟。

说真的你们把我当成什么？我真的很好奇。我现在已经无法判断谁是我该相信的，谁是我不该相信的。我已经受够了，累了。你们有时对我好，有时却对我冷漠但现在却不一样。是我变了还是你们都变了。在我眼里一切都变了。

也对，时代都会变，有什么是不会变的呢？我已经是过去了，在你们眼里，也许我只是棋子，虽你们去摆。是我太用心了，太包容，所以你们一直都没察觉。要怪也是怪我自己。现在我不能在傻下去了，该是时候离开了。从用心，一切都会变成死心。我不能在折磨自己，这只会让我更恨我自己。谢谢你们给我那些美好的回忆。虽然想不到下一站该去哪里，但如果我勇敢的往下走，一定会抵达目的的。如果我变成回忆，希望你们不会忘记。

我的痛苦谁能体会

我的悲伤谁能感受

我的自责谁能解脱

我的不足谁能谅解

Am I The Only One Stucked Here, Not Wanting To Move On? Screw It Man. It's Like I Want To, But I Don't Want To.

When Reality Is Harsh, We Just Accept It. I Wish It Was That Simple. I Want To. I Really Want To. But It Feels So Hard To Swallow. I Want To Just Gulp It Down. I Can't.

My O Level Results Just Sucks. I Was Aiming 10 Or Below But I Expected 12. And I Got It. Just Unexpectedly. Didn't Expect Both My Humanities To Be A B3. It Just Sucks. Neither Did I Expect Both My Pure Sciences To Be An A2. Life Just Love Throwing Me Surprises. And It Sucks Even More When After I Deduct 2 Points, It's Still 1 Short Of Entering MJC Or NYJC.

Now I'm Really Caught In A Dilemma. Guess I Regretted Not Working Even Harder. They Say 1 Point Doesn't Make A Difference, But It Does. NOW IT DOES. WHY??? OMG. So Many Things I Really Regretted. Regretted Not Taking HMT. Regret Not Dropping To Combine Science, Cause I Could've Gotten An A1...

Now Dilemma. I Can't Make The 'Perfect' Decision. I Don't Mind Going To JC. But I Want To Enter A Good One, Because If I Enter An Average Or Lousy JC, Going Into University Won't Be Easy Too And I'll End Up Not Being Able To Enter The Course I Want To. I Need At Least An AAA/B For My IGP. How Easy Can That Be!? 

Now, If I Go Polytechnic, I'll Be Heading To NP Cause Their Business Courses Are The Best In Singapore.  I'll Probably Be Taking Up Business And Financial Studies. Problem? NP Is Really Far From My Home. Though There's Shuttle Bus From Hougang, When I Head Home, I'll Need About An Hour. And When I Enter Local Universities, I Don't Get A Year Exemption But Only Some Modules Exemption. And I'll Need At Least A 3.80 GPA Score.

So Now.. Polytechnic Or JC? I Guess I'll Leave It To Fate. I Just Believe That No Matter Where I Go, If I Work Hard, I'll Succeed. I Will.

Now.. The Most Difficult Part. To Accept Is The Fact That I'll Be Going Separate Route As My Friends And We Won't Be Able To Meet Up As Often Or Maybe Even Once In A Blue Moon. It Really SUCKS That JC Holidays Doesn't Clash With Polytechnic Holidays. It Just Means.. Chalets, Outings, Meet-Ups, Basketball, Cycling, Frisbees, Movies, Buffets, Shopping, Memories, Lepak Together.. Maybe Not Really No More, But Not That Common. Now.. Moving On Is The Stupid Part. It's Harsh. It Ain't Easy. But I Guess Everyone Has To Go Through That. It's Just Part Of Life.

时候到了

该往下一站了

我走了

再见了

I Really Love How It Is Now.. Those Friendships.. They're Wonderful. I Hope They Will Last Forever. But Will They?

A Great Way To Start The Year With A Memorable And Unforgettable Chalet! HAHAA! It Was Really Fun. Didn't Regret Going Though My Pocket Really Got A Hole Already!

First Day, I Came At Night Just For The BBQ. The Food Was Really Niceeeeee! Thinking Of It Just Whets My Appetite! The Satay Was Good, So Were The Chicken Wings! (: The Baked Rice Was Also Nice! HAHA! And Not To Mention, The Breezer Was Really Good! Someone Even Got Drunk! HAHAA!

Spent Most Of The Second Day Rotting In Chalet! Not Really Though. Watched CZ12 In The Afternoon And It Was A Great Movie! Quite A Comedy Show! The Rest Of The Time I Was Just Lazing On The Comfy Bed While Some Went To Play Pool. Didn't Join Them For Gambling Also!

Day 3 Was Awesome! At Around 1 am, We Went Cycling Till About 4 am, Covering 22.30 km! Whole Body Aching! AHhhhhhhh. And Drinking Again In Broad Day Light! LOL!

For Now, Just Exactly 1 More Week Till I Get My O Level Results, So I Want To Play As Much As I Can! Because I Know After I Get Back My Results, I Will Be Demoralised And Will Not Have The Mood To Play Anymore!

一切都会过去

这只是迟早的事

但是你们让我的人生

充满了无数珍贵的美好回忆

谢谢