The Feeling Of Being Left Out Just Got Worst By The Days. Yep Everyone Has Their Own Cliques, And I Can't Seem To Fit In Anywhere. I'm A Complicated Piece Of Jigsaw That Cannot Be Fixed Into The Puzzle. I Don't Know. It Just Seems To Be Because Of The Things I Do Or Don't Do. Maybe That's Why. Just Feel Extra Everywhere I Go. Having Friends Is One Thing. I Have Many Of Them. But Being Able To Blend In With Them Is Another Thing.
Dinner Today With FOCAS People Was Great. Get To See Everyone. HAHAA! Able To Chit-Chat Within The Group Before Everyone.. Splitted Into Their Self Created Groups. And Yep. I Realised I Don't Fit Into Anywhere. The Feeling Of Being Extra. Kinda Awkward. So Not Used. Made Me Realised How Much I Missed Life In Sec School. Love All My Awesome Friends. Didn't Have As Many Friends, But The Friends I Had Was Enough, Because They Are The Friends Whom I Really Needed In My Life.
And The The Best Reason I Can Probably Come Up With. Interest. I Don't Do Too Many Things. I Don't Blog Shop, I Don't Dress Up, I Don't Gym, I Don't Smoke, I Don't Club. I Don't Fit In. And When I Don't, I Just Become A Quiet Person. Been So Quiet These Days. I Don't Feel Like Talking, And Then End Up Being Ignored. It's Just Not My Conversation. Maybe I'm Not Trying, Or I'm Just Trying Too Hard Without Realising Because I Really Can't See Myself Actually Trying.
And The Worst Thing. My Parents Don't Even Understand Me. Seems Like I Can't Join iDare Camp This Time. All They Say Is I Keep Joining Camps And Never Focus On Studies And When I Told Them Camps Are During Holidays, They Say I Never Contribute To The House Etc. They Just Don't Want Me To Join Because What They Say Ain't True. I Contribute During Holidays, But Not Now Because It's School Term. And When I Don't Do Well, You All Nag At Me. This Just Doesn't Make Any Sense. Not Anymore. I'm Too Tired To Argue. Too Shag. And Maybe It Just Isn't Your Day Too, So I Don't Want To Blow Things Up. Maybe It's Better I Don't Go. Maybe. I Really Hope So...
Alone. I Really Feel Like Throwing Everything Into The Bin.
好累好累
我也很希望
自己能开始习惯
孤独的生活
可惜不知要等到
何时何时
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